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Grab a Tissue Because it’s Time for The First Inaugural Roast.

A few weeks ago I was experiencing a blog identity crisis and announced that I would be undergoing a sex change.  I mean a name change.  Since then, amid all of your incredibly cool suggestions, and...

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ChowderHead: The Beginning

…so I’m sitting in this cafe, slumped over a piss-warm cup of dark roast coffee, casually tossing ashes into the tray at the end of the table.  The lighting is inadequate where I’m seated, making it...

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Case Study: Yahoo Answers

I’ve come to the gradual realization that Yahoo Answers is the electronic version of The Magic 8 Ball.  In other words, it’s the biggest pile of shit ever plopped into a flaming paper bag and dropped...

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When Life Hands You Lemons, Open a Swiss Bank Account

So I’m sitting on a park bench whining to some random nerd, when suddenly he cuts me off mid-sentence, and barfs out a common cliche all over my new shirt: Nerd:  “Well, you know what they say: when...

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Sleep Deprivation Olympic Challenge: Day 1 Results

**In case you missed the introduction to this whole mess that I’m subjecting myself to, be sure to read here first:  Chowderhead’s Official Sleep Deprivation Olympic Challenge.** Well, Day 1 of the...

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The Sleep Deprivation Challenge Ends

I’m sad to announce that The Official Sleep Deprivation Challenge is now officially over.  Put down your Pom-poms and exit the bleachers in a single file line.  [Insert distraught emoticon face.] At...

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A Dinner Date with the Indie Chicks

I have great news to share with you today!   I’m sitting in my front yard right now sipping a Cosmo in nothing but a banana hammock and a pair of thong sandals! Just kidding.  That would be shitty...

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Conversations with Cats

Last week, Jeff from Content Unrelated gave us a take on what it would be like if dogs could speak in a post titled, Conversations with Dogs.  Today’s piece is dedicated to a much more refined species...

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5 Creative Ways to Avoid Small Talk

I take the act of avoiding small talk as seriously as the pentagon does counter-terrorism.  It’s not like I ever have anywhere important to be, but it still grinds my ass when someone tries to impede...

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Valentine’s Candy Messages for the Cynical Single Person

Alright!  It’s taken me five grueling months to decide on the first candidate to stand under the hot-lights, but I’m 100% confident that I found the perfect mix of raunch and class to pop the...

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